Welcome…

We are rhapsodic to break the news we have turned from two to three and the family has a new member… WitCrumbs… a blog dedicated to celebrate wittiness…

Witcrumbs is a space to blabber random & absurd thoughts. Its  a canvas to doodle haphazard lines & dots. Its a cocktail of vodka and tea. Its epitomizing freedom of speech on WebSphere that has come to be BLOGGING…

To sum up the spirit…This blog drifts in the giant gulf between what is said and the person who doesn’t get it…

This new vehicle witcrumbs.com is driven by me using a borrowed alias Akki (well I’m paying a hefty EMI for the same) and I ain’t a typical truck driver by profession but I still used to drive www.sensationally-numb.blogspot.com without licence and spread as much emotional/cultural/social pollution as I could. Well the fuel was the CO2 that used to build up and travel all the way to my brain…and exhaust was a deadly mix of fizzing witty thoughts…

Luckily the truck has been refurbished, overhauled and today has a new avatar ….but the pollution I assure would remain the same 🙂  so…. have fun till I pollute….

Captain Dada

Outsourcing of IPL has resulted in African fever to a few people associated with it.
The most recent victim seems to be Kolkata Knight Riders, Ke-Ke-Aar as they are called.
They have decided that there would be a new captain for each game. <Link here>
This has refreshed my childhood memories of street-cricket…where even my friend’s gardener was named as Captain cuz he used to watch our game…

I wonder..well after quite some time now that I too want to captain KKR. After all Dada does not seem to have any problem with it…and his “goal is to score runs and take wickets”.
Well can he “run and score goals and wick* tickets in SA???”

*for the uninitiated, wick=Sell in Marathi

Michael-Masakkali

Micheal Jackson has expressed desire to enter in his concerts in London, riding on an African elephant with panthers led on gold chains. Parrots and other birds will fly behind him, he will also perform role of ‘Masakkali’ on the Delhi-6 song… <Link here>

I admit my-lord..I made up last line… but I was amazed that MJ can FLY….
This is in addition to the other wonderful things that he can do …which are approximately 21 less than what Rajnikanth could do…

a glimpse>> he can sweep the floor 360 dg. without moving 1 inch from his place, he can sit in a xerox machine yet the copy would be white…he can change his nose more times then I can bat my eyelids in 3 seconds (well I am mere mortal afterall)…and his ‘befriending attitude towards childern’ is known to one and all… Well ‘Michael in Wonderland’ is all I can say

Squabble in the household…

I wonder what would have happened if there were no Celebrities in this Celestial System…what my dear journos would have done for living and breaking their bread…lemme take a guess…they would have been sleuths/detectives…

A recent incident to prove their prowess happened in Pitt..err…Jolie..or .err.. Pitjolie [;)] household…
Apparently Jolie slapped Pitt since he was massaging the nanny of their children….and poor nanny lost her job <Link here>
Well nothing new in that…but what takes the cake is the ‘fness’ … all in details…

“She got right in Brad’s face, screaming at the top of her lungs, and told the nanny to get out of her house and never come back. The argument woke up the sleeping twins, who began to cry.”

I’ve some questions of mine:

  • Did the nanny had any notice period?
  • Did she serve it?
  • What was her package/ C2C? Was she paid any severance allowance?

On a tangent…Saifeena are India’s answer to Brangelina, since they do not have twins yet,

  • Will they have twins?
  • Will the twins be sub-size zero?

they might not have a nanny (atleast for Kareena..I assume), so they might have a maid…

  • Will Saif care to give massage to his maid?
  • If Kareena catches Saif in the act, will she scream at the top of her lungs?
  • Does Kareena have lungs?

My info says Size Zero have 1 lung, 1 kidney, zero brains and…umm…well…no heart??

Great going Judge-Sahab 2

The good news continues to come from Court of Sonepat, where the Hon Judge held a minor guilty of murder and sent him to work as peon in govt school (Link here). Earlier I’d blogged about another ruling here.

Wish if we could apply similar sense while sentencing Majors well err…our politicos. I can’t wait to see the day when these criminal-MPs and MLAs sweep my streets, clean my toilets and drive the garbage trucks.
Well On second thought, they might turn it into Jhadoo Yatra, Sandaas Rally and Kachra Morcha…..

The thought is shivering to say the least….

BREAKING NEWS!!! Obama and Hillary are siblings

An earth-shattering, ground trembling, Humpty-dumpty tumbling news has just broken….
Obama and Hillary are actually siblings..born to the same Afro-parents….and they have a sister…who is yet un-named…

Well all this happened in Malaysia (Link here) with an innocent lion family…tch tch tch…poor cats..

I am wondering…if this happened in India, how offended the poor cubs might feel if they are called Lalu/Amar/Mamta/Jaya…..

I see a certain Maneka taking up their case in the highest court of law…

well once again I wonder….

Kill..don’t foot the bill

The Hon. Supreme Court has made a very intersting ruling ‘Killing another in self-defence is one’s right’.

Well ‘fness’ emanates from the heading…and I celebrate it…….

I’d been exercising this right since my kid-hood by killings mosquitoes, rats, cockroaches. With time I graduated to killing chicken and sea-fauna and goat and lamb and pork…well all done in self defense (ummm… lick…burrp…..).

My lord, all these delicacies were ‘fidayeens’ out there…. and deep down my heart, I have this satisfaction of saving human race….A super-human is born (who wears underpants, under pants)

1..2..3…Sold

Mr. … err Dr. Vijay Mallya seems to be in bidding mood..from IPL to Gandhi’s items…he’s buying it all. I wonder (as always) that the spectacles, a 1910 silver Zenith pocket watch, sandals, a golden bowl and thali could work wonders for Mallya in IPL season2!!!

  • Dravid can use the specs to spot the ball and preserve his timber.
  • A reputed bowling coach in ‘Golden-Bowl’.
  • Pocket watch could be for Uncle Sunil Joshi…the time’s up dude..
  • Sandal..well….if nothing of the above works….

And if they still manage to achieve the ‘coveted wooden spoon’ then they’ve got the thali…

Filmfare & not-so-lovely

Yesterday the much coveted Filmfare awards were televised and the who’s who of Bollywood were present to revel with the fraternity,.
However much they deny, but the effect of recession was evident. On every performance, Ms. Zinta would do WoW…whats new in that..right and how is it related to recession?? well on 3rd or 4th instance you’ll spot it. Its the same shot aired after every performance…well Ms Zinta wasn’t alone… ever-so-young Rekha, giggle-machine Ash and big-B.. all were caught in one-expression-shot…

Of all, the young Lucky from OLLO put the best thank-you speeches of all time to shame with a piece of his…brilliant I say…

Did we miss Amarsingh…seems he ws busy in giving away ‘awards’ of his own…after all the great indian tamasha is round the corner….

Naam me kya kya rakha hai….

“I thought it was a joke because somebody was saying that why will anybody want to hurt a cricketer,” said the Sri Lankan pacer Vaas’ wife, Vasana. (Link here)

No dirt/malice intended 😉 , but I luv the names of these Srilankan Cricketers (he..he..he)…and better still, name of their better halves… I am making a logical guess, what if a lady, her name is Purush calls and wants to talk to her husband…..Will the lanka skipper answer it ???

well as always…I wonder….