WitCrumbs

Category: Linkz

  • Captain Dada

    Outsourcing of IPL has resulted in African fever to a few people associated with it.
    The most recent victim seems to be Kolkata Knight Riders, Ke-Ke-Aar as they are called.
    They have decided that there would be a new captain for each game. <Link here>
    This has refreshed my childhood memories of street-cricket…where even my friend’s gardener was named as Captain cuz he used to watch our game…

    I wonder..well after quite some time now that I too want to captain KKR. After all Dada does not seem to have any problem with it…and his “goal is to score runs and take wickets”.
    Well can he “run and score goals and wick* tickets in SA???”

    *for the uninitiated, wick=Sell in Marathi

  • Michael-Masakkali

    Micheal Jackson has expressed desire to enter in his concerts in London, riding on an African elephant with panthers led on gold chains. Parrots and other birds will fly behind him, he will also perform role of ‘Masakkali’ on the Delhi-6 song… <Link here>

    I admit my-lord..I made up last line… but I was amazed that MJ can FLY….
    This is in addition to the other wonderful things that he can do …which are approximately 21 less than what Rajnikanth could do…

    a glimpse>> he can sweep the floor 360 dg. without moving 1 inch from his place, he can sit in a xerox machine yet the copy would be white…he can change his nose more times then I can bat my eyelids in 3 seconds (well I am mere mortal afterall)…and his ‘befriending attitude towards childern’ is known to one and all… Well ‘Michael in Wonderland’ is all I can say

  • Squabble in the household…

    I wonder what would have happened if there were no Celebrities in this Celestial System…what my dear journos would have done for living and breaking their bread…lemme take a guess…they would have been sleuths/detectives…

    A recent incident to prove their prowess happened in Pitt..err…Jolie..or .err.. Pitjolie [;)] household…
    Apparently Jolie slapped Pitt since he was massaging the nanny of their children….and poor nanny lost her job <Link here>
    Well nothing new in that…but what takes the cake is the ‘fness’ … all in details…

    “She got right in Brad’s face, screaming at the top of her lungs, and told the nanny to get out of her house and never come back. The argument woke up the sleeping twins, who began to cry.”

    I’ve some questions of mine:

    • Did the nanny had any notice period?
    • Did she serve it?
    • What was her package/ C2C? Was she paid any severance allowance?

    On a tangent…Saifeena are India’s answer to Brangelina, since they do not have twins yet,

    • Will they have twins?
    • Will the twins be sub-size zero?

    they might not have a nanny (atleast for Kareena..I assume), so they might have a maid…

    • Will Saif care to give massage to his maid?
    • If Kareena catches Saif in the act, will she scream at the top of her lungs?
    • Does Kareena have lungs?

    My info says Size Zero have 1 lung, 1 kidney, zero brains and…umm…well…no heart??

  • Great going Judge-Sahab 2

    The good news continues to come from Court of Sonepat, where the Hon Judge held a minor guilty of murder and sent him to work as peon in govt school (Link here). Earlier I’d blogged about another ruling here.

    Wish if we could apply similar sense while sentencing Majors well err…our politicos. I can’t wait to see the day when these criminal-MPs and MLAs sweep my streets, clean my toilets and drive the garbage trucks.
    Well On second thought, they might turn it into Jhadoo Yatra, Sandaas Rally and Kachra Morcha…..

    The thought is shivering to say the least….

  • BREAKING NEWS!!! Obama and Hillary are siblings

    An earth-shattering, ground trembling, Humpty-dumpty tumbling news has just broken….
    Obama and Hillary are actually siblings..born to the same Afro-parents….and they have a sister…who is yet un-named…

    Well all this happened in Malaysia (Link here) with an innocent lion family…tch tch tch…poor cats..

    I am wondering…if this happened in India, how offended the poor cubs might feel if they are called Lalu/Amar/Mamta/Jaya…..

    I see a certain Maneka taking up their case in the highest court of law…

    well once again I wonder….

  • Kill..don’t foot the bill

    The Hon. Supreme Court has made a very intersting ruling ‘Killing another in self-defence is one’s right’.

    Well ‘fness’ emanates from the heading…and I celebrate it…….

    I’d been exercising this right since my kid-hood by killings mosquitoes, rats, cockroaches. With time I graduated to killing chicken and sea-fauna and goat and lamb and pork…well all done in self defense (ummm… lick…burrp…..).

    My lord, all these delicacies were ‘fidayeens’ out there…. and deep down my heart, I have this satisfaction of saving human race….A super-human is born (who wears underpants, under pants)

  • Naam me kya kya rakha hai….

    “I thought it was a joke because somebody was saying that why will anybody want to hurt a cricketer,” said the Sri Lankan pacer Vaas’ wife, Vasana. (Link here)

    No dirt/malice intended 😉 , but I luv the names of these Srilankan Cricketers (he..he..he)…and better still, name of their better halves… I am making a logical guess, what if a lady, her name is Purush calls and wants to talk to her husband…..Will the lanka skipper answer it ???

    well as always…I wonder….

  • Great going Judge-saheb

    Court in Sonept (my guess…its in Haryana) has directed the Cops to return the bribe with 9% interest… (Link here)
    Story has it that the man was threatened with 3rd degree torture, and to escape-he paid up 30k bucks to the Cops, but look at the silliness of cops, they still inflicted “3rd degree” on him…

    of the two accused cops Rao and Rai…rao is dead and rai has retired…so now there would be complications…
    Maje lete time to dono ne liye the..but ab ticket fata to ek ke naam pe…

  • Caught without Ticket

    Of all other charges, Kasab the bugger has also been charged of being without ticket at CST… (Link here)

    I wonder…during the Kandhar hijack drama, did the politicos buy tickets for the buggers they carried along and handed over them to the talib-f***rs…
    If not, shouldn’t they be booked under flying without tickets or boarding passes or whatever….

  • Words…and words are all I have……

    Lassitude: My first reaction -> Lass’ Attitude

    Inglenook: 😉     he he he ….nothing dirty

    Onomatopoeia : Man….no idea in hell….

    These are some of the 100 most beautiful words in English…. Check here for the rest>>

    I wonder what all words would feature in top-ten if they go by usage…wonder more if they come out with a Hindi counter part list of such most used words….guess I can figure out most of them … he he he 😉